


Letting Off Steam

by bramblefae



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-25
Updated: 2014-02-25
Packaged: 2018-01-13 18:25:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1236541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bramblefae/pseuds/bramblefae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Cullen works through some things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letting Off Steam

**Author's Note:**

> Cullen's been an interest of mine for a bit, and I had the hardest time "getting into his head", so to speak. Thanks to the band Tool, specifically the songs "Lateralus" and"46 and 2", I was able to get this out. It was pervasive enough that I have an illustration to go with it, oddly enough.  
> The premise here isn't a typical story/drabble/whatever. It's a specific scene of Cullen, taking to the practice dummies (We can assume in Kirkwall, sometime in the Second Act? maybe) with a two handed weapon, specifically to work out some things in his head. :)
> 
> For this piece, even more than my other fan fictions, I would love to hear feedback, both on the writing and the content.

     A good swordsman can use several weapons because you never know when you may lose the one in your hand. The Order is known by the shield we carry, but I can use a two-handed sword as well as I can a long sword and it is to that weapon, which is less finesse and more barbaric savagery, that I turn when I need to not think. Fighting with a sword and shield requires the mind to be constantly engaged, even when I am not trying to contain a mage.

     There is a soothing sense of calm involved in beating the shit out of a practice dummy with a weapon that takes both of my arms to wield properly. I've used the great sword in actual combat only a few times-and always on the rare occasion that my shield is made useless.

     With a shield, combat is all about defense, deliberation and control. With both of your fists wrapped around a weapon, however, being able to feel the strain in back and shoulders of heaving this towering mass of steel over your head, it's easy to give in to bloodlust. It's easy to find yourself at the end of a fight, weapon dragging on the ground, chest heaving, throat scratching, surrounded by corpses and unsure how exactly you got there.

     It is too dangerous for a templar to find himself in that position, so I keep my broadsword for practice, for letting off steam.

     A templar's life is not generally an easy one. You can certainly lead a good life, an honorable life.  ***thwack!***

     But easy, no. That's not generally a templar's lot.

     Blessed Andraste said that Magic exists to serve man. That means we templars exist to see that Andraste's holy words are kept. ***thwack!***

     People say that we opress mages and I can even concede that sometimes it must look that way. But just because they cannot help the curse, the burden, that they are born with, that does not mean that it is not our duty to protect the rest of the world from what they can be capable of. It doesn't mean that we should not protect them from the normal people of Thedas, from themselves even.  ***thwack!***

     It is easy to want to be lenient with some of these mages. We often see them first as frightened children, often having never been away from family. Of course this is sad and sometimes heartbreaking, but this is why trust in the Maker is such an important part of the Order.  ***thwack!***

     Sometimes, a recruit will get…attatched to a mage. I always try to be quick with the discipline because I know, too well, what can come of that. And some nightmares never go away.  ***thwack!***

     I try to tell the recruits that it's natural to admire the beauty of a wolf, but to forget, even for a second that it is always a wolf first, is to risk not only your own life but the life of everyone around you, for a wolf can only act like a wolf.  ***thwack!***

     Most of the mages here will never even consider the evils of blood magic. But you don't need blood to burn a house down. That's another thing I try to teach my recruits. Having the responsibility over mages is not a license to be cruel. Most of the unregistered mages we find as teens or children, we find because fear has driven them to lose what little control they had over their burgeoning powers. And it is that fear- of people, of us- that makes them so dangerous even without the constant threat from demons.  ***thwack!***

     Mages need to be able to trust us to have their best interests at heart, as well as those of the general populace. But by both of our very natures, any sort of trust on either side is nearly impossible. For every good and decent mage who understands why we must do what we do, there are 5 half crazed hedge mages running loose around Thedas. And for every good and decent templar who understands that his duty lies also in protection of the mage, not just from the mage, there is one who think he has power over the mages in his charge.  ***thwack!***

     It is not the fault of mages that things are as they are. It is the fault of individual templars who should be living a life guided by the Maker but instead use our holy shield to abuse and terrorize. ***thwack!***

     They never seem to be the ones who've actually seen the very worst of mages.  ***thwack!***

     Who've seen their own innermost thoughts and desires laid bare and mocked.  ***thwack!***

     Never the ones who've walked through fire in the Maker's name and retained themselves.  ***thwack!***

     Who will bear the scars forever inside of the worst a mage can be.  ***thwack!***

     They are never the ones who understand that the very worst of mages is a  ***thwack!*** failure on the part of the templar  ***thwack!*** a failure to protect the people from the mage  ***thwack!*** and the mage from herself!

 

***THWACK!***

 

***THWACK!***

 

***THWACK!***

 

_[He stops here, breathing heavily, weapon down, head down.]_

Maker, guide me to be a good templar and a good man. Guide me to do that which is right, not just that which is expected. May the light of Blessed Andraste shine on us all.

 

 

 

 


End file.
